The Real Reason She Won’t Submit to You

The fiery, outspoken, and oftentimes polarizing Michele Bachman is always in the news. Recently, she was drew a lot of attention about a comment she made about women submitting to their husbands. In the comment, Bachman stated that she submitted to her husband’s suggestion that she go back to school for a post doctorate degree in tax law, even though that’s not what she wanted to study. When asked about her comment, Bachman said for her and her husband, submission means respect.

Even though Marcus Bachman seems to have Michele Bachman’s full submission, many men find it difficult to get their women to submit to them. I recall being told by an ex-boyfriend that I should submit to him. Why? Because he is the man and the Bible says so. Needless to say, I refused that request. Not because I wasn’t capable or desirous of submitting, but because he wasn’t submission-worthy.

I learned a long time ago, that every man is not worthy of my submission. Many other women today have come to realize the same thing, even though we crave the guidance (not dominance) of a man.

Men, you must realize that in this day and age, a women’s submission is not your birth right. You have to earn it. So, if you want your women to submit to you, like Michele Bachman does to her husband, ask yourself, “Am I worthy of her submission? Would I make her feel respected and safe? Or would she walk away feeling like a fool?”

If you’ve ever wondered why your woman won’t submit, wonder no more. Here are the top five reasons.

1. The man before you messed it up. Believe it or not, I am a proponent of submission. And women really do want to submit. It’s natural and quite easy for us to be lead by men. Any woman who has ever been in love can attest to that. So, when we have our first encounter with a man who takes advantage of his natural influence over us, that begins to inch away at our desire to submit. After that misuse of influence happens a few more times, our desire to submit becomes effectively suppressed for the sake of protecting our hearts. So, if you are a deserving man and your women won’t submit to you, then you may need to blame to dude(s) that came before you.

2. You don’t have a plan. You know, I believe that God made man the head of the household for a reason. Like women have a natural instinct to nurture, men have the natural instinct to lead. That is their gift from God; much like women’s intuition is our gift from God. Women naturally look to men for leadership and guidance, even though today we are being socialized against that. Because women are naturally drawn to leaders and a man who has a goal, if you don’t have a plan, a woman is less likely to trust her heart, her life and her future to you. She can’t give you her submission if you haven’t proven that you can make sound decisions. No plan, no submission. Point blank.

3. She can’t trust you. You said you were coming over but didn’t. You said you would call, but didn’t. You said you would pay the water bill. But didn’t. You said, you said, you said. But you didn’t, didn’t, didn’t. She can’t trust you. So she isn’t going to submit to you.

4. You cheated on her. Do I really need to say anything more? You would not submit to someone who cheated on you, would you? Guess what? Neither will we.

5. You won’t commit. You want her to submit, but you won’t commit. You want her to follow your lead, but you won’t drop your other women. You want her to be there for you, but you don’t answer the phone when she calls. You want her undivided attention, but you are divided. Do you really expect her to submit to you? I mean really?

So men, when you say that women don’t submit like they used to. You are right. But can you blame us?

Teowonna Clifton is That Teowonna. She is a communications specialist, newspaper columnist, blogger, and all-around ‘it’ girl. She has an opinion on everything. Visit for more… if you dare!